MARATH

Y5.11 #marathINSIDE Heretic (2024): Safe and totally not trapped in Bible study with Mr. Reed and the girls, where the symbolism and gaslighting is A+ Amen.

Y5.10 #marathINSIDE Fire In The Sky (1993): There was this guy Travis who, uhmmm... what had happened was, uhmmm...

Y5.09 #marathINSIDE Nosferatu (2024): Ellen, in the famous words of Ms. W. Williams, “you are an icon, you are a legend, and you ARE the moment.” (Nosfewho? Nosfewhere? Please, wake me up when he finally shows his rotting, mustache-donning face.)

Y5.08 #marathINSIDE Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (2012) — With the 16th President of the United States, ready for whatever.

Y5.07 #marathINSIDE Dumplings (2004): If you are what you eat, am I about to be babies, meat, tofu, vegetables, or a combination of all? 🍵🥟🥢All jokes aside, watching this Chinese horror film was uncomfortable at times due to the women-centric topics — scary, scary stuff.

Y5.06 #marathINSIDE Crocodile 2: Death Swamp (2002) — The day red flags stop being hot in horror is the day I stop liking them. Point being, I was deeply enthralled by these dudes that I forgot I was watching a freaking crocodile movie so when the animal finally showed I was like, riiiiiiiiiiiiggght… the crocodiiiiiile… I’m scared… 😊🤭

Y5.05 #marathINSIDE Parasite (2019): Some say dark and suffocating, I say intimate and cozy.

“Dad, today I made a plan - a fundamental plan. I'm going to earn money, a lot of it. University, a career, marriage, those are all fine, but first I'll earn money. When I have money, I'll buy the house. On the day we move in, Mom and I will be in the yard. Because the sunshine is so nice there. All you'll need to do is walk up the stairs. Take care until then. So long.” —Kim Ki-woo

Y5.04 #marathINSIDE the dark world of Eric Knudsen (aka Victor Surge): A joyous and foggy day in Vermont, 1890.

Y5.03 #marathINSIDE The Hole (2001): Witnessing female delusions going from the super cringe to the ultra psychotic should be an endurance sport — Liz’s delulu left me feeling exhausted and dissillulu ngl.

Y5.02 #marathINSIDE Bloodsucking Bastards (2015): Yes, the office is full of Vampires. And yes, it is getting colder and darker in here.

Y5.01 #marathINSIDE Crimson Peak (2015): Staying in on New Year’s Day, basking in the decrepit decadence of our current reality, making big plans for 2024 whilst looking back and thanking God for the year that is no more.

“A house as old as this one becomes, in time, a living thing. It starts holding onto things... keeping them alive when they shouldn't be. Some of them are good, some of them are bad. Some should never be spoken about again.” -Thomas Sharpe

Y4.19 #marathINSIDE Poor Things (2023): Not exactly The Queen Mary, but close enough lol 🚢🥀 [If you haven’t already, go to the theater for POOR THINGS and enjoy the art of movie making. The film was so well done and beautiful and had a great message, that of reinvention, of starting again.]

Y4.18 #marathINSIDE House of 1000 Corpses (2003): Looking at topless autographed photos & minding our own business at Spaulding’s.

Y4.17 #marathINSIDE Talk to Me (2023): Oh, the art of self-destruction, how thrilling it is to watch! 🍿If you needed yet another example as to how NOT to endure life’s hardships, look no further and join Mia’s party - in all seriousness, she should have 1) listened to the timely and sensible advice she was given, and 2) taken it🍿

“His body should kick 'em out. They get weaker the longer they’re in. Give it time.” -Cole

Y4.16 #marathINSIDE The Exorcist: Believer (2023): Waisting my time in disbelief… mmh… at least the church is nice… sigh… double sigh… cameo sigh… expensive sigh…

When you measure Blumhouse’s latest money-grab flick against the mediocre reboots and reimaginings of the last few years, Believer is, to put it kindly, inconsequential at best. Don’t waste your money or your precious time on this *nothing* movie, just don’t. 🤬(P.S. Studio corporate horror must end. Please stop treating us, true horror fans, as cheap commodities. Our dollar$ might be worth more to you than to us, but our time is priceless.)

Y4.15 #marathINSIDE Triangle (2009): Visiting Jess’s purgatory loop in lieu of The Queen Mary Hotel, Long Beach CA. Who would have thought a mother’s never-ending guilt would fulfill my need for an old-timey transatlantic boat? 🚢⚓️

Y4.14 #marathINSIDE Paranormal Activity (2007): Katie and Micah were good hosts ⭐️⭐️⭐️/5. Would have given five stars had they joined in the fun with the ghost.

Y4.13 #marathINSIDE La Casa Lobo aka The Wolf House (2018): Having a magical and darkly beautiful good time with María, Pedrito, and Ana. 🌲👩🏼🐖🐖🏚🌲 [This stop-motion animated movie is a piece of Art and I beg you to please watch it if you haven’t already. From beginning to end you won’t be able to look away, get pulled into the story, into the visuals, into the sounds, and, most importantly, you won’t be able to stop asking yourself, How the hell did they accomplish doing that? And that… and that… and also THAT!!? Such a beautiful gift to the world from our brothers and sisters from Chile and Germany. By the way, per IMDb, production took five years to finish with an estimated budget of $245,000 and a gross worldwide of, wait for it…$1,970... hope that was an innocent typo on their part and not the truth because that would be low-key offensive. I am offended.]

Y4.12 #marathINSIDE Barbarian (2022): The Airbnb at 476 Barbary Street is perfect for all your serial killer needs, so don’t wait any longer and reserve your stay today and let Bonnie Zane, your friendly and reliable host from Greater Wayne Property Management, help you enjoy Detroit like a true local. (Feel free to call us anytime!)

Y4.11 #marathINSIDE Piggy (2022): Being *this* third wheel ain’t so bad tbh… [also, best new movie release of the year! waited since January for it and was so worth it! watched it twice already and I’m still buzzing! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️]

Y4.10 #marathINSIDE Pulse (2001): Doom and gloom with Ryosuke and Harue.

Y4.09 #marathINSIDE Friendly Video Rentals in Seattle, browsing the “Adventure” section before hitting Cafe Nervosa.

Y4.08 #marathINSIDE Ice Cream Man (1995): Sharing is caring, also, Cherry Garcia is the superior flavor, fight me.

Y4.07 #marathINSIDE House of 1000 Corpses (2003): Getting entertained by the delusional rants of sweet and lovable Otis.

[[ "Why", you ask? "Why" is not the question. How? Now, that is a question worth examining. How could I, being born of such, uh... conventional stock, arrive a leader of the rebellion? An escapist from a conformist world, destined to find happiness only in that which cannot be explained? I brought you here for a reason, but unfortunately you and your sentimental minds are doing me no good! My brain is frozen. Locked! I have to break free from this culture of mechanical reproductions and the thick encrustations dying on the surface! Oh, Christ… fuck it. ]]

Y4.06 #marathINSIDE Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2022): Fifty years later and Leatherface still kills it! So savage! So gory! So woke!

Y4.05 #marathINSIDE Malignant (2021): At Madison’s on Super Bowl Sunday, doing totally normal Super Bowl Sunday things with her and Gabriel while simultaneously enjoying the last weekend of California’s indoor mask mandate, hell yeah! 🥳

Y4.04 #marathINSIDE Vicious Fun (2020): Awkward first time introductions at support group with emotionless killer clown Fritz, cannibal sous chef Hideo, mass-murderer Zachary, teen slasher Michael, all-American psycho Bob, and “taxi driver” Phillip.

Y4.03 #marathINSIDE A Nightmare On Elm Street 5: The Dream Child (1989) - Celebratory potluck with Greta and company.

Y4.02 #marathINSIDE Begotten (1989): Being extra weird and stuff lol kill me please thnx! :)

Y3.15 #marathINSIDE The Loved Ones (2009): Making my special pancakes and sharing them with Lola and Brent.

Y3.14 #marathINSIDE The Tax Collector (2020): Classic awkward family photo taken by la abuela when el primo esta de malas y no quiere sonreír. [Can all my Hispanic brothers and sisters relate, o la verdad no?]

Y3.12 #marathINSIDE The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974): Just when I thought I could enjoy a cute little moment alone while drinking my smoothie and admiring the sunset the next door neighbor comes and starts causing ruckus, I mean, excuse you, six feet apart, thank U.

Y3.11 #marathINSIDE Gone Girl (2014): Just two Type A’s hanging out, doing whatever.

Y3.10 #marathINSIDE Sinister (2012): No, no, no… YOU go look…

Y3.07 #marathINSIDE Trick ‘r Treat (2007): When they ask me if I am decorating for halloween this year…

Y3.06 #marathINSIDE The People Under The Stairs (1991): Spending some quality time with these troublemakers.

Y3.03 #marathINSIDE Misery (1990): Intense Annie is intense, but that book club though.

Y3.02 #marathINSIDE The Munsters TV Series (1964-1966): Lockdown shenanigans with the boys.

Y2.15 #marathINSIDE The Invisible Man (1933): Plotting mischief with my favorite megalomaniac, Dr. Jack Griffin.

Y2.14 #marathINSIDE Se7en (1995): Another day at the office with Somerset and Mills.

Y2.13 #marathINSIDE The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (1920): Living my best extra life inside Francis’s delusion because reality be damned.

Y2.12 #marathINSIDE Sharknado (2013): When you are so extra you defy the laws of physics.

Y2.11 #marathINSIDE The Addams Family TV Series (1964-1966): Always the weirdo in the family. Never not having fun.

Y2.09 #marathINSIDE La Hora Marcada TV Series (1988-1990): With my first horror bae.

Y2.07 #marathINSIDE Sinister (2012): Watching some messed up home movies alongside Ellison.

Y2.05 #marathINSIDE The Nun (2018): Spending time with the girls, don’t we look gorge together? (Valak serving looks as per ush.)

Y2.04 #marathINSIDE The Lure (2015): Gold, Silver, and Marath enjoying a refreshing glass of water on this hot summer day.

Y2.03 #marathINSIDE Happy Death Day (2017): My friend Baby-Mask and I [wearing last year’s halloween costume btw] playing a game of tag with Tree to cheer her up while she’s in the hospital.

Y2.02 #marathINSIDE Sweeney Todd: The Barber of Fleet Street (2007): Why so serious?

Y2.01 #marathINSIDE Thir13en Ghosts (2001): Selfie time with Dennis and Arthur because there is always time for a quick pic, even when you are about to get attacked by a couple of ghosts.

Y1.26 #marathINSIDE Zombie (1979): 2016 was too generous with us and are happily satiated… 2017, “We are going to eat you!” [01.01.2017]

Y1.25 #marathINSIDE The Shining (1980): Super happy fun times with Jackie Boy.

Y1.24 #marathINSIDE Troll 2 (1990): The Queen and I enjoying some vegetarian snacks.

Y1.23 #marathINSIDE Frankenhooker (1990): Keeping an eye out for my honey.

Y1.21 #marathINSIDE Happy Birthday To Me (1981): You guys, Ginny is in the mood for some Porto’s… do you know if they deliver?

Y1.19 #marathINSIDE John Carpenter’s Halloween (1978): My boo was gone for a hot second but he is back!

Y1.15 #marathINSIDE Dead Snow (2009): When you announce to your man that today [July 6] is International Kissing Day and he gives you this look…

Y1.14 #marathINSIDE Nosferatu, eine Symphonie des Grauens (1922): Arriving to Wisborg, super grateful we didn’t catch the mysterious bug.

Y1.13 #marathINSIDE The Conjuring 2 (2016): Arts and crafts at the Warren’s.

Y1.12 #marathINSIDE It (1990): The invite specified black balloons… classic Penny, such a rebel.

Y1.11 #marathINSIDE Only Lovers Left Alive (2013): Band practice.

Y1.10 #marathINSIDE The Devil’s Backbone (2001): Ghosting like it’s our day job.

Y1.08 #marathINSIDE The Bride of Frankenstein (1935): Lucky number six.

Y1.06 #marathINSIDE Frankenstein (1931): My buddy and I being total pervs.

Y1.03 #marathINSIDE The Wolf Man (1941): Hanging with my old man on this eternal full moon night.

Y1.02 #marathINSIDE Dracula’s Daughter (1936): Holding my woman’s purse while she does her thing.

Y1.01 - On today’s inaugural edition of #marathINSIDE we celebrate The Bride of Frankenstein (1935) where Marath is not the bride, but the texting buddy.