The Texas Chainsaw Massacre is my favorite horror franchise as it not only deals with a fucked up family (so scandalous!) but also with a timeless supervillain, Leatherface.

I am not going to lie, sometimes my brain hurts while trying to make sense of the many timelines and characters but, baby, the whole Texas Chainsaw universe—eight movies and counting—is very entertaining and fun to watch so it is definitely worth a headache or two lol. One thing is for sure, movie after movie, no matter the scenario or point in time, the always misunderstood Leatherface is the one who is victorious at the end of the film which makes him a true icon in the genre, and the kills, don’t forget the kills! That towering, faceless (aka emotionless aka non-human) monster of a man, armed with a chainsaw, a meat cleaver, and meat hooks equals perfection in my book.

I would like to give you now my Top 5 Yes to YAZ! list of the most enjoyable moments from the classic nightmare that is The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003) remake:

No. 5 – The black & white classified police footage of the crime-scene walk-through played at the beginning and the end; the found footage style paired with the awkward interaction from those in it was so unnerving to watch and would have loved more of it.

No. 4 – Erin’s smart character; that woman was such a badass and don’t get me started with that dreamy body of hers. (I will stop here before I embarrass myself.)

No. 3 – Sheriff Hoyt and his family; they all were scary and somehow managed to be the perfect example of what gaslighting and manipulation looks like. I rather deal with Leatherface than with those demented folks, I’ll tell you that much…

No. 2 – Leatherface, my beautiful, beautiful Leatherface and his usual shenanigans; I know this must apply exclusively to me and my silly imagination, but the reason why I enjoy his character so much is because I sort of see him as a victimized child (yikes, it sounds bad when I say it aloud, doesn’t it?) trapped in the body of a powerful man whose sole purpose is to protect his family. In my mind, the family is the problem and Leatherface is just there paying the consequences of years of abuse and neglect (projecting much, are we?) – come on, this cannot be that crazy of an idea and I even bet you know what I’m talking about if you also watched Texas Chainsaw (2013) and Leatherface (2017).

No. 1 – The suicide of the young hitchhiker; this scene was extremely brutal and blew my mind, haaaard! The poor girl looked so messed up and frail that I immediately felt sorry for her and wanted to protect her. My heart hurt when she started crying and yelling to go the other way because she did not want to go back to the “bad man,” as she called him, when suddenly, she started freaking out even more and reached down her skirt and grabbed a handgun out of her vagina and put it in her mouth and pulled the trigger. Fuck.

So there you have it, bada-bing, bada-boom, the wacky Texans kept it real and did a great job as per usual. Bye, bye!

Excuse me, you mind getting the fuck outta my way, son? -Sheriff Hoyt

In Love and Fear,

-Marath